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Chapter 5: You Are Here

 

Center of the World

            “I Am,” Revisited

            Stones, Ponds, and Ripples Revisited

One Being’s Rights Stop Where the Next Being’s Rights Begin

 

We revisit and greatly expand on concepts introduced in Chapter 3 — our place in the Wholeness, the power of “I Am,” etc. — this time from the standpoint of Why and How, as a rationale for the fact rather than a simple statement of the fact.

 

We learn that a sense of one’s self as “I Am” is natural and normal, that controlling others and allowing others to control us is not natural, though we are taught that it is.

 

 

Just being here is not enough. No other being in the entire universe as we know it, no other being in creation (the wholeness), simply exists. To extend the thought, no being in the wholeness exists strictly for its own sake, and humans are the only beings who even try to exist separately from the rest of the wholeness.

 

Our basic problem is that we humans simultaneously consider ourselves more and less important than we actually are: to bolster our own confidence and feed our individual and collective egos, we show a facade of greater importance to each other and the world, but we do so because we know instinctively that we are no more important than any other being in creation. To level this emotional see-saw, we need to learn that we truly are as important as every other being in creation, but also that every other being is as important as we are. Because the individual can heal the collective of humanity only by healing himself, we must first separate ourselves from the collective. To accomplish that separation, we will begin by investigating our individual vantage point.

 

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The concept of “I Am” is important because you can control only yourself. It is right to control only yourself. It is right to control yourself and your life completely. Consequently, you can create change only in yourself. You will make the world better, but only by the example of your life, not by forcing anyone else to change. To change yourself, you must make peace with yourself and with your place in the Wholeness. That means claiming control of and responsibility for yourself. “I Am” is a way to claim or reclaim yourself and a way to release control of and responsibility for others. Note that when you claim complete control of yourself and release all control of others, this is a personal decision that cannot be forced on others. In other words, this does not have to be reciprocal, and most often, it won’t be. Others might still believe they control you, and if that’s what they want to believe, that’s their business. But remember that they cannot control you without your assent.

 

To help you fully realize your power to change yourself, your power over your circumstances, here are a few exercises:

Consciously practice calming yourself through meditation, self-hypnosis, or some other calming, mind-clearing relaxation exercise. I’ve included a few techniques later in this chapter. I most often repeat one of a few favorite phrases that work well for me:

 

 

Life simply is what it is.

 

I am where I am supposed to be.

 

 

Remember that every decision you make, no matter how small, opens up a new set of alternative futures and closes others. For example, you are where you are physically and emotionally as the result of decisions you made earlier. Even if someone else decided to move, you made the decision to go along. When you decide to move again, you will end up where you should be again. Sometimes you’re “where you should be” in order to learn a lesson you need to learn; sometimes you’re where you should be in order to teach someone something they need to learn. Strive always to make decisions that are in harmony with the Wholeness. And remember that, in all matters physical, mental, and emotional, change occurs only when the pain of being where you are finally outweighs the fear of change.

 

Once you’ve reclaimed yourself as an individual being responsible for your own actions, emotions, mental state, and son on, consider also that all other individual beings enjoy that same freedom and that same responsibility. This brings us to the next point:

 

One being’s rights stop where the next being’s rights begin.

 

The billions of individual sensory universes in the Wholeness overlap and fluctuate constantly. Your rights , your control, is asserted from the center — from you. The other being’s right and control are asserded from its center. You have no right to exercise control over him, and he has no right to exercise control over you, so one being’s rights stop where the next being’s rights begin. You might say, you can reclaim yourself, but not in a aggressive way. You reclaim yourself to benefit yourself, not to spite someone else. Be detached from the outcome.

 

MORE ABOUT INDIVIDUAL SENSORY UNIVERSES HERE

 

Consider

 

1. He has a right to control himself and his universe.

2. You have a right to control yourself and your universe.

3. Each of us controls how we react to outside stimulus, in every case.

a. He can choose to do something for himself, but no matter what he chooses, he cannot do something to you, control you, without your consent.

b. You can choose to do something for yourself but not to someone else without their consent.

4. Think and act only to control yourself, only for yourself, not to anyone else.

a. Does this mean you can’t do something for someone else? No. Only that you can’t be tied to the outcome. Give without a thought for recompense; take without greed or guilt.

b. So if someone else does something for me without a thought for recompense, can I at least say thank you? Yes. Your “thank you,” in whatever form, is a gift, freely given. He didn’t do something for you so he would receive your thanks, and you don’t give your thanks in the hope of eliciting a “you’re welcome” or other response.

5. Constantly practice not being tied to the outcome. Practice being detached.